Sun Dance

[jasonsnene]

Title:  Sun Dance

Author:  jasonsnene

Pairing:  Spike/Willow

Rating:  R/NC17

Warnings: Body mutilation and intense ritual practice

Beta: 

vamptastica

 

 

For

snogged, who understands that sometimes kink is more than sex, it's spiritual.  *hugs*

 

Incorporates the kink suspension from my

kink_bingo table.

 

 Information on the Sun Dance Ritual can be found here.

Note:  This is not your typical Nene fic…please make special note of the warnings.

 

 

 

They were losing him.  As the days passed, it became more and more apparent.  Buffy had tried talking to him and fighting with him.  Xander had baited him.  Nothing had worked.  Willow thought it was her turn to try.

 

Her methods, though, weren’t anything she’d ever dreamed of doing before.  She was terrified, but felt in her heart, her soul, that this would reach him where all else had failed.  Gathering the tools she needed, she headed to the basement and crouched by his side.

 

“Spike?”  She hadn’t expected a response, and didn’t get one.  His soul was burning him from the inside out.  It broke her heart and made her want to try this even more.  Anything to bring him back, make him whole again.

 

“Spike, I know you can hear me and I want you to know that I want to help you.  We must make a sacrifice, you must sacrifice the pain and guilt you are carrying so that you can come back to us.”  Her voice broke and Willow lowered her head as tears streamed down her face.

 

Fighting for control, she worked his t-shirt up, lifting it over his head.  He allowed her to move him as she wished.  “The Native Americans used to perform this ritual, to make a sacrifice to the Sun God.  You must make a sacrifice too, Spike.  Do you understand that?”

 

He didn’t respond, but he did appear to be listening and she took some small comfort in that.  Spreading her tools around her, she lifted the ceremonial dagger she used when performing more advanced spells.  It was blessed, and she prayed the Goddess would extend the blessing to him.

 

Willow ran her fingers down the flesh on his chest gently, comfortingly, before she pinched a large section between her fingers and held it out.  Sliding the knife through, she cringed as the blood flowed, but knew it was part of the ritual.  “You stole flesh, life, Spike, so you must return flesh to regain your life.”

 

She sobbed again, but didn’t cease her movements as she gathered up her next tool, a large railroad spike.  She slid it through the hole in his skin until it came through the other side, forming a piercing in his chest. 

 

She stood then and guided him to his feet.  This was the most important part, and he had to cooperate or the ritual would fail; she would fail him.  Calling her magic to her, Willow focused on the railroad spike and felt it move.  She focused more and forced it to move higher in the air, lifting Spike to his toes.  “Fight it, Spike.  Give the sacrifice of your flesh and free yourself.  You can do it.  I know you can.  I believe in you.” 

 

Willow continued to pull, providing enough pressure to strain the wound, but not enough to pull it free.  He would have to do that himself.  For a long moment, she thought he wouldn’t respond, then his eyes seem to clear, to focus on her, before they drifted down to his chest and the spike held there.

 

She knew the moment he recognized it for what it was, when his mind processed all she’d said, all she’d told him, and with a roar he jerked himself free of the spike, leaving it suspended with her magic in the air.

 

His chest was bleeding, the flesh given and he collapsed with a sob.  Willow pulled her magic back into her and knelt by his side, placing the bloody spike in his hands and gathering him in her arms as he let go of the pain he’d been holding so deep inside.

 

When he quieted, Spike stared for a long moment at the spike he held, seeing it for the freedom it represented.  He lifted his head and gazed at her with eyes that were cognizant for the first time since he’d returned.  His hand lifted, brushing her hair and he kissed her gently on the forehead.  “Thanks, Red.”