Dark Fantasy

[jasonsnene]

Title: Dark Fantasy

Author: jasonsnene

Pairing: Xander/Caleb

Rating: NC17

Warnings: Torture, Rape, Fisting, VERY DARK psychologically
Summary:  Xander fantasizes about what he'd like to do to Caleb after losing his eye.

A/N:  So...you ever write something that you just think is too much?  That's where I'm at with this one.  I posted it at darker_xander a while back and realized I'd never posted it here.  PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS.

 

 

 

Some people might call them Nightmares. Xander doesn’t. To him, there’s nothing scary about them. They are his fantasies, his darkest desires. In them, he’s always back at the winery with Caleb. Sometimes Caleb succeeds in taking his eye. Sometimes he doesn’t. The fantasies are always better when he does. In those fantasies, Xander fights back, even with the blood from his gouged eye pouring down his face and the overwhelming pain. 

 

No one else is there. It’s just him and Caleb. When Xander fights back, Caleb loses. Xander ties him over those damn casks of wine and pummels him. Fists and feet and any other weapon he can find are used to beat every inch of that cursed body.

 

Caleb never cries for mercy. Xander wouldn’t give it to him anyway and he doesn’t need the fantasy of Caleb begging. No, in his darkest dreams, Caleb just takes it. Not quietly, though. Caleb screams with each bone that is broken and every piece of skin that is split.

 

When the screams turn to whimpers, and they always do, that’s when Xander strikes. He rips the collar off Caleb’s neck and stuffs it in his mouth.   It’s so completely offensive to Xander that Caleb dares to wear that collar with the things he does. When he’s gagged, Xander strips off Caleb’s clothes and admires all the bruises he uncovers.

 

They’re always beautiful in his fantasy, not splotchy and discolored. The bruises he’s inflicted are perfect in their color and symmetry. Caleb’s body is a piece of art now, created by Xander, for Xander, and even being the one-eyed wonder that Caleb has made of him, he can still appreciate the beauty.

 

But he’s not done yet. He wants Caleb to feel that helplessness that he felt that day. He needs Caleb to know that no one is going to stop him, no one is going to help him. Just like Xander felt when he saw that thumb coming towards his eye.

 

Xander moves behind Caleb, where he can’t be seen. That’s always important in his fantasy. Caleb can’t see him, just as Xander now can’t see half the world. The fantasy changes then. Xander never knows just what he’ll do next.

 

Sometimes he’s kind of nice. He shoves fingers into Caleb’s ass and just finger fucks him while he taunts him. Other times he slams his cock into Caleb so hard that he feels the tender skin ripping and tearing under his invasion. Xander has found that on his worst days, the days when he feels totally helpless and useless that this fantasy is his favorite.

 

Caleb screams so beautifully when Xander rapes him. His power is gone now. Xander feels that each thrust takes more of Caleb’s power away from him. He never comes though. Ever. He doesn’t want to fuck Caleb. He wants to make him feel little. He will never give him anything else of his body, not his blood and certainly not his seed. 

 

Then there’s the days when he just needs to be cruel. Those days, he shoves his entire fist into Caleb and laughs through every muffled scream of pain. He laughs when the blood drips down his arm and puddles on the floor beneath them. He laughs when he opens his hand and grabs whatever he can and rips it right out of Caleb’s ass. The days when he’s angry, this is the fantasy he turns to. 

 

Of course, they’re all just fantasies. Spike and Buffy saved the day after all. And Buffy made sure that Caleb would never hurt anyone again when she sliced him in half. Oh what Xander would give to have seen that, to have been there the day that dark light went out of Caleb’s eyes.

 

Maybe he’ll fantasize about that next.